PC hardware with the most improper Halloween name | Tech Rasta


Horror game you say? Feh, the hardware is awesome too. One time I turned on the power supply and it floated into a cloud of smoke. Last year I cut my hand to the CPU cooling radiator. And you saw how dusty my PC was before I cleaned it. That’s the terrifying base of the body.

Obviously unaware of the product’s ability to shock and cripple. Sometimes, hardware makers for PC games try to create a formidable aura by giving them big and bad names. You’ve probably seen one of these things: a keyboard named after a sword. Laptops touted as mythical creatures and the like. But some people seem intimidating when they consult a group of animals and creepers in their children’s Halloween costumes. Nicknames that are creepy enough to cause fear. Even before it has a chance to cause minor injury or force you to go through the tedious warranty replacement process? Let’s find out.

AMD Wraith cooler

CG render of AMD Wraith Spire cooler with glowing RGB lights

Name Ghost and ghost-adjacent It usually goes well with CPU coolers. Most of the ghosts are allegedly cold and silent: both the features you’d expect and want from something cooler, or even worse, like AMD’s Wraith series.

However, ‘Wraith’ in particular? Not very well. Wraiths are vengeful spirits – again, allegedly – which means they are ‘Haunts you into insanity’ more than the jolly Casper-type dead. And such hauntings would be hard to do if they were silent instead of tormenting you in front of you. All these titles tell me that if I use the Wraith cooler, it will boil my CPU instead of cooling it. Or spin the fan so fast that it bursts and buries itself in a portrait of a nearby ancestor. of a relative who looks like me . Conclusion: Scary, but not for the right reasons.

PowerColor Red Devil graphics card

PowerColor Red Devil RX 6950 XT graphics card on a plain black background.

Unfortunately, these have the same issues as the AMD Wraith series: the name calls for power (yes), but refers to undesirable features for computer components (boo). Once again you’ll see what they are. think because the devil is strong and strong So the graphics card named after it has to be strong and powerful, too. There has never been a Radeon RX 6600 XT Fluffy Cloud or GeForce RTX 3070 Koala Bear before.

Still, the ‘Red Devils’ reminded me of two things in particular: Satan and Manchester United, meaning this graphics card would be too hot and smell of sulfur. Or would it take every Sunday afternoon and on occasional Thursday nights let me down.

3dfx Voodoo Banshee AGP

3dfx Voodoo Banshee AGP graphics card on orange background

It’s more like this The combination of scary nouns and other nouns The same thing that it is impossible to ignore the disadvantages. Applies to graphics cards with only one fan. It’s an opportunity for jokes about screaming and loud noises. And what it is: Built on a 350nm process, the Voodoo Banshee can use 16MB of memory and has a widowed 100MHz clock speed.

3dfx probably thought this would have Nvidia, Matrox, and the rest of the 1998 graphics scene covering their ears. Alas, Voodoo Banshee met mixed reviews and by the end of 1999 had been replaced by the interestingly named Voodoo Velocity. much less An example of branding worthy of Halloween, Voodoo Banshee remains one of the industry’s better endeavors.

Razer BlackWidow Keyboard

Razer BlackWidow V3 keyboard against a dark sci-fi background.

There’s no shortage of unnecessarily aggressive Razer titles to choose from. Since most of them insist on borrowing from the deadly creatures. Not cool, even fictional – think real-life bastards like snakes, sharks, and insects. It all comes down to BlackWidow or DeathStalker for inclusion on this list. The past won because it was a spider. And I’ve never seen a felt scorpion in the seasonally decorated aisle at Sainsbury’s.

sometimes it sags But in general, I love Razer keyboards, including the latest model, the BlackWidow V3, although this is another case of mismatched creatures/products. Black widow spiders are small, lightweight and rarely emit any venom when bitten by humans. Mechanical keyboards are big, heavy, and can kill anyone. If you put a neurotoxin on the WASD key

Still, I’d give Razer a terrifying point for completing the full kit: it’s a real beast that’s still pretty terrifying and appropriate for this time of year. Better than a scorpion

Intel NUC Beast Canyon

Front and back view of a blank Intel NUC Beast Canton PC.

Ok, forgot the name for a moment. See that skull? That’s Halloween, that’s right, that’s right, October 31st, this fun Milky Way glyph and gets the Intel NUC system our attention. Even if it’s just a reference that they’re ‘barebone’ PCs, if so I just got it. don’t laugh at me

However, the Beast Canyon is the newest mini PC. It’s the halfway point between laptops and desktops where you procure the graphics card yourself. Again, it’s the name flattering the hardware – real and/or mythical creatures are unlikely to have anything to do with downsizing. work table or eliminate the noise from the fan. As the average NUC enthusiast might be – but at least ‘Beast Canyon’ has something unsettling and incomprehensible. What animal are we talking about? How wide is the valley? Is there a place to hide? Sounds rough, I’m leaving.


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